The other day, I went out on my porch for a few minutes while Christian played with Melody inside because I felt like my brain was overwhelmed. Thought after thought, idea after idea collided and conflicted in my head until I just needed space to breathe. I pulled out my journal and started to write but quickly realized that everything I was writing was about ME. My ideas. My thoughts. My solutions to life. I was driving myself crazy.
So I prayed… God, YOUR will be done. I tried to take a deep breath and let God speak. I don’t even think I made it to cracking open my Bible. I didn’t need to. What God was trying to tell me, I already knew by heart.
God quietly reminded me of how HIS world works. How He created life to work in a specific order. And I couldn’t help but notice how I like to mix that order up.
It sounds too simplistic to me to say that God’s order is to PUT GOD FIRST, prioritize my husband second, my daughter third and everything else after that. But it’s true. God gently reminded me that putting life into His fulfilling order really is that simple.
When I looked at my list though:
- God first,
- Christian second,
- Melody third,
- Work, Volunteering, Writing, Friends after that.
I realized that on any given day or in different seasons of my life, I tend to reorganize this list as it suits me or based on my stress level!
Even today I would say it’s hard not to want to make my list look like this.
- Work and Writing first
- Melody second
- Christian third
- God after all of that
Here is an example of how I sometimes think about things, since my procrastinating personality wants to deal with the things that have deadlines first:
Inspire Me! Monday is coming up and I have work with my business to do, so I should do it first today to the exclusion of everything else.
Except when Melody needs me.
Christian is slightly more patient than Melody (but not by much), so I will put off working with him about his priorities until he is really frustrated with me. Then I'll help him because I really do want to, I'm just having difficulty juggling everything.
God seems to be the most patient of all. Waiting patiently (I hope) for me to come around to Him. He will be the least angry with me when I finally get around to having time with Him later tonight or maybe tomorrow or...?
But functioning in this way is costing me something, isn’t it?
Let me add a little clarification here also.
Putting GOD FIRST, could look different for each of us in different seasons of our lives. I remember a time when Melody was born when I knew God wanted me to be with Him throughout the day. Just to breathe and feel His presence constantly with me without necessarily sitting down every day to read the Bible and study. I knew He wanted me to enjoy motherhood- to appreciate this role He had given me. He was molding me for a season and a lifetime of enjoyment with Him and with my daughter.
NOW though, I know that God is trying to mold INTENTIONALITY in me (as I shared here). I know without a shadow of a doubt that He wants me to sit with Him on purpose, out of my own choice, and choose to come and be with Him.
He has blessings of knowledge and wisdom He wants to give me and in this season, I can only receive them by taking a 'Mary' approach and sitting at His feet.
I also know that putting my husband second looks specifically like serving him. Washing dishes, making food, folding laundry, vacuuming and dusting. His love language is “acts of service” (if you know about Gary Chapman’s book Love Languages at all) and it is all too clear exactly what Christian needs me to do for him to feel loved by me.
As I face this last week of Lent, I can’t help but notice that letting my priorities get out of line is costing me in every area of life. It is costing me peace, joy, rest and I am pretty sure it is costing me success and favor in what I do. I am not saying I think God is punishing me, I am saying that working out of God’s way of doing things just generally doesn’t work… At least in my experience this has always been true. So here I am, the last week before Easter (my favorite holiday!), desiring to align my heart in God’s way and not my own, trying to focus on following through with my original fast because I know God has good things for me when I do. In short, I am trying to surrender my stubbornness to do life my own way.
Here are the articles that have been INSPIRING and ENCOURAGING me when it comes to putting God first in my daily life.
I hope they are an inspiration for you as well!
I hope you will join me again next week for Inspire Me! Mondays! Be sure to let us know what has been inspiring you this week. I would also love to know...
What does putting God first in your life look like for you in this season of your life?