At the end of the twins pregnancy it was difficult just to walk! Then I recovered from a c-section, Peanut started having surgeries, Melody started school and dance and I jumped back into a part time job. Fast forward to today and I have grown weary of nights without sleep, days without showers, months without wearing make up and a full year of feeling like making it through the day is an admirable goal.
It is time.
2014 is when I get my life back. When I start living my priorities again. I know there will still be days where the goal is just to survive, but I simply cannot live that way as the rule anymore.
I don't plan to change this by sheer determination (though that will be a part of it). I sincerely am prayerful that God will carry me through this year and mold me into a better ME than I currently am. I know I don't have any reason to feel guilty about where I am- in fact, there is probably good reason for me to think it could take MANY years to return to feeling some kind of normal under the circumstances. But something in me is yearning to regain my lost dignity a bit, and I long not to feel defined by the needs of the current moment constantly. Changing this will take time and effort, but as I said before- this is the time.
So without further adieu- in no particular order:
My list of changes to make in 2014.
1. Return to pumping and quit using formula (as much as possible) for the twins for the times I am not around or they need a supplement.
2. Get serious about saving money for a down payment on a new house.
3. Take time to unplug from the TV and the computer more often.
4. Make our home organized and presentable. (Clear out the clutter that has accumulated from being pregnant and adjusting in life and finally get good- or at least better- at cleaning and tidying.)
5. Make myself organized and presentable. (Return to making lists, wearing make-up at least occasionally, wearing real clothes rather than house clothes, etc)
6. SLEEP MORE and choose health over convenience.
7. Take time for God, service to others and fellowship with my church community.
8. Spend more time with Christian.
9. Get out of the house!! Both alone and with the whole family.
10. Find more ways to stay positive and relaxed.
11. Let go of mommy guilt!
12. Prioritize items of importance on my to-do list, not just the urgent ones.
Unlike typical New Year Resolutions, I know that this is a list that will take time to tackle. It would be ridiculous to attempt to change all of these things about my life at once! Yet, at the end of next year, I hope to have made significant progress in many or all of these areas. After all, when I look back at my life this time last year, we have come a long way!
So tell me, what changes do you plan to make this year?